Interesting is an understatment

So, for the first time, in a long time, things started looking up. Everything at work was going really well, I haven't fired anyone in awhile, haven't been in a fight with customers in quite a long time. But, I'm only allowed to have a certain amount of peace in my life. I topped out and needed to be reset to zero apparently.

Enter Friday night.
It's a little busy at work, and I had someone call off already due to a tummy ache. Great excuse for a 23 year old. After that, someone else decided they were just coming in an hour late. Whatever. No big deal. Then he notices that he has new shoes on. I told him that he should change them, otherwise they'd get ruined. So he leaves. Punched him out of the register. And then 3 hours pass. I called someone else in, and we were fine on people for the rest of the night. 3:30 am the kid comes back. He's disoriented and trying to get my managers card so he can get change for the $50 he has. I was a little concerned and didn't want him touching the drawer. So I went up there and asked him for the 50. He didn't have it. He said he would get it from his car. Came back. No cash. Then he just asked for $20 straight out of the drawer. I told him that wasn't going to happen. Then he asked me for cash, and everyone else that was working. Still no. I walked away from him. Then he started following me around, "Yo, Anth, come for a ride with me. I'll go pick you up some bud or something. Just come for a ride man"

Wow. At that point, the fact that he was severely cracked out hit me. I knew, I just didn't want to believe it. So I threw him out of the store.

At the end of the night, when I counted all the money, we were short $100. I thought I did a deposit wrong, or something like that. Because that kid wasn't anywhere near the drawer. I didn't let him near it.

So I called the district guy, and let him know, that we should fire Rob, because he's coming in on crack again, and that $100 was probably in a deposit. Well he checked it, and the 100 was gone. So he told me he'd call back in awhile.

He watched the video of Rob punching in. He took my managers card and opened the drawer. Grabbed a $100 bill, then put it back, and took out 5 $20 bills. Sneaky bastard. So they said they were just going to take his check for reimbursement. Then, Shawn, my good boss also told me they were setting up a sting to arrest him. That didn't work, so they just sent a couple cops over to his house to arrest him. Pretty sure he's in jail now. And the owner is personally pressing charges and filing a restraining order against him.

Awesome.
I really don't know what else to say about this story. Kinda sucks cause I lost a good worker. Oh well. Guess that means people shouldn't do crack.

This is why I hate holidays...

Ok, so, I don't really hate the holidays. Not too much at least. But, for the most part, I've gotten more considerate and passive about my disdain for this oh so special time of the year.

I love shopping. For me. I don't like shopping for other people. I just don't. It's not spending money that bothers me. It's the fact that every year I seem to be followed around malls by crazy old ladies. Because, since this week I haven't slept more than 15 hours combined, I figured I may as well zombie walk through the malls looking for retarded things that only come around once a year. Why does anyone need a Santa Claus shot glass set? Oh, that's right. So they can get through the season totally smashed all the time. Kinda like that time in high school...

This is a story told second hand. I was actually not involved. I was at the other side of the parking lot smoking a bowl at the time this happened.

Step back 2 years.

Because, he could get away with it, my friends Steve and Mike decided they were going to be festive. Every morning before school for the month of December. All the way until Christmas.
How did they do this you ask?
A liquoralender. That's how. Remember those little calendars that every day you got a piece of chocolate, or a little toy or piece of candy in? Johnny Walker came out with one of those too.
A piece of chocolate filled with black or red depending on the day. Or perhaps it was just random. I'm not sure. But, really, one shot worth of booze? What's that going to do for anyone? So Steve also managed to keep a martini set in his car. 2 cups, and a shaker. Other paraphernalia also included... Christmas. At the high school level. Boozing at 7 in the morning. Because they could get away with it. Because it was still dark out. And we paid off a school employee. I would like to state that J.B. is still employed there. In case anyone cares to try that again.

That is a prime example, of how holidays should actually be handled.

I would also like to propose a new policy.

More than just the season itself, I hate the songs. I can not listen to Christmas music. I have the same argument with my mother every year about this. I get angry every time I hear Christmas music. This is not over reacting. At least for myself, this would keep the holidays moving faster. I would like to suggest that every time a Christmas song plays a shot of booze should be consumed. This DOES NOT apply to radio stations that only play Christmas music until New Years. I will not be responsible for alcohol poisoning again. If I'm out shopping, or walking around and happen to hear a carol, because I usually tune them out, I will write down on a tally sheet the respective number of said songs I hear in a day. Then, either before, or after work, (TBD) I will take the appropriate number of shots of whiskey. I will be taking a sign up for peoples commitments to the Holiday boozing campaign. Or hey, if you just wanna drink, and not count songs, that's cool too. Someone else has more songs racked up, that they shouldn't drink for.

So, since I've migrated far enough away from my original point on this post, as much as the holidays bother me. I believe I've found a way to cope. And this way is almost legal. It's about 8 months un-legal. Close enough for me.

You have cancer, surprise!

As I drove home from some store a couple nights ago, when I was actually having a decent day I saw an advertisement on the side of a bus that said; "You have prostate cancer. Go to Roswell Park."

Interesting. I didn't know that. I missed that memo. Hear that mom? I have prostate cancer. I'm just gonna skedaddle over to R.P. real quick, get that all checked out, yeah, I'll get milk on the way home too. Shouldn't be too bad, right? I mean its not like I wanted to keep it a secret or anything. What better way to freak the hell out of people than letting them stare at a big purple death bus at 4 in the morning. "Hi, good morning world! I'm a goofy purple bus, and I'm here to ruin your day, or maybe week, or maybe even your life!"

My personal issue with this is as follows;

Can you do that? Can you buy advertising telling people that they have a terminal illness and to go to where you rape dying people for money?

Yeah sure, clearly other stupid things like, you're going to hell, or Bush sucks can be plastered all over something. But what about terminal illness that could simply throw someone into a suicidal spiral. Then consider this scenario.

Said person sees bus. Looses their sanity. And then is committed to a mental institution because they are utterly convinced that they have cancer. And they have to get to Roswell Park. Could that person sue Roswell Park for all of the medical bills they acquired whilst being "insane" and also collect mental and emotional damages?

If, that is possible in any capacity, like $500 or more in payments, I would like everyone to know that I will be shortly declared insane. I'll be staying at the "happy house" for a few months. Then, I'll be filthy rich. And no. I see absolutely no moral problem with this at all. Stealing money from the health care tycoons is not a legal issue. Not in my eyes. And I'm insane. Remember?